Hero

I flicked on the light in the family room last night to check out the noise.. I’d heard some scrabbling about while I was on my way to bed and was afraid that Phallix the cat might be harassing my puny pal Pavo again. It was just Pavo at his seed dish.

Pavo looked up and blinked. “Sorry to hear about your eyes Big Guy,” he said through a mouthful of millet. “Is it serious?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about Pavo.”

“I just overheard you and Mrs. Big Guy talking about getting eye pads so I figure you might have an eye infection. Maybe conjunctivitis, or something like that?”

“Um . . . let’s talk about this Pavo. Because you happen to be the subject of our discussion.”

“Whatever you plan to accuse me of, remember, I’m innocent ‘til proven guilty. And I’ve been here in my cage all evening.”

“But where were you this afternoon Pavo? And don’t give me that virtuous look. It doesn’t work anymore.”

“Well, you did leave your computer running Big Guy, And all I was trying to do was reach one of my fans.”

“The only fan you should be interested in is the kind that could chop your tail off Pavo.”

“Wait a minute B.G., you’re the one who started all this blogging stuff and it’s not my fault that I have a fan club now.”

“But you left my computer keyboard a mess Pavo. It’s totally unusable. What were you thinking?”

“If you must know Big Guy I was thinking of becoming a hero.”

“A hero? How did you intend to do that?”

“Back up for a minute B.G. Let me tell you the whole story.”

“This better be good Pavo. If it’s not, it’s out in the winter cold for you.”

“I’m a friendly kind of guy, as you know Big Guy. And you’re also aware of my doo-doo dot clairvoyancing powers. Usually, all you have to do is put a piece of paper with something somebody has written on the bottom of my cage. Then, after it gets covered by doo-doo dots, I scratch through them and I can tell what the writer really has in mind.”

“How does my keyboard enter into this discussion?”

“All this new computer stuff makes it awkward. When you put something somebody has written up on the computer screen, I can’t do my act because it’s displayed vertically. So, putting two and two together I figured out the keyboard was the connection.”

“But . . .but”

“Don’t ‘but’ out yet Big Guy. It worked.”

“What worked? Not the keyboard anymore. The keys might as well have been Superglued together.”

“But I got the message. Right up there on the screen. Two clues. I-land and res-Q.”

“Are you sure you weren’t getting a message from one of your teenage friends? That sure looks like a Twitter tweet to me.”

“I’m really impressed B.G. You’re finally beginning to understand bird talk. I guess during all my twittering and tweeting, you were actually listening.”

“But the message makes no sense.”

“On second thought, I’m disappointed B.G. You’re not paying attention after all. The message is telling me that it’s from a lady who lives on an island and wants to be rescued.”

“C’mon Pavo. There’s no way you’re going to get a human lady off an island. You’ve been watching too many James Bond movies.”

“A big guy lady? I was thinking more like a budgie beauty. I could handle that.”

“And what island are you talking about Pavo. We’ve got a million of them scattered across the face of the earth. If you don’t happen to have a specific one in mind you’d just be spinning your wheels, . . . digging a pit, metaphorically speaking.”

“Wow! You’re a genius B.G. You’ve just given me another clue, the word pit.”

“If that’s supposed to be a clue Pavo the only Island I know that begins with pit is Pitcairn?”

“That’s it!” said Pavo, bouncing up and down inside his cage. “We’ve solved the message. Now I can get to do the hero part.”

“Slow down Pavo. Do you have any idea where the island is?”

“I know exactly where it is. We stopped there on my original trip east, – on the slow boat from Australia. We stopped for water.”

“And you want to go back there?”

“Bingo Big Guy! But I need you to give me a hand because another piece of my clairvoyanced message that I forgot to tell you about also suggested there might be a bounty involved.

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About D. B. Guy

ex-traveler, ex-Navy vet, ex-depression baby, long time retiree, current lounge chair occupant, husband, grandfather, computer novice-junkie, man-about-town(ret.), jolly good fellow
This entry was posted in My Pal Pavo. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Hero

  1. Jean says:

    Dear Mr. Guy,

    It appears you have an endothermic mutiny on your hands. Pavo has gone high-tech on you. Divining info from his doo-doo on newspapers on the bottom of his cage is soooo yesterday. Getting it from your computer is much faster and more efficient. If worst comes to worst, so Mrs. Guy and you can get some sleep, perhaps you will have to invest in an IPad for him and attach it to the side of his cage. (Not the bottom!) He will be tweeting on Twitter in no time, using the hunt -and-peck system of course.

    I trust by now you have a new keyboard. It might be advisable to cover it well when you are not using it in the same way you cover Pavo’s cage at night to protect him from Phallix. He is quite a resourceful avian though. You know he is devising innumerable ways to save fair damsel from the clutches of some arch villain. You don’t suppose he is also scheming to spend the rest of the cold New England winter on a balmy South Pacific island, do you? Maybe Tenerife would be more to his liking.

    That could give Phallix ideas for you to finance a trip for him to Katmandu. Then Phydeaux will be sitting up and begging for a romantic rendezvous in Chihuahua, Mexico. These situations do have a way of escalating, all because of a little doo-doo. If you’re not careful, your bank account could be taking a hefty hit this winter!

    Aloha!

    Jean

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